Let that be enough…

So this is yet another blog I wrote a few years ago, that I think may be encouraging to some of us now. It’s amazing to read it and remember what I was struggling with at the time, and to be conscious of how much Jesus has brought me through since then. Still today, I come back to the fact that my greatest vulnerability is to believe that there is anything I need that Jesus hasn’t promised to give me. And still, my greatest need is to be reminded, again and again, of His commitment to me, and His passion to work on my behalf and for my good. So here it is, friends, a journal entry from a struggling kid written almost 4 years ago. I hope it makes you leek more deeply at Jesus, and His love for you.

 

November 04 2007

 

…be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we can confidently say,

 

“The Lord is my helper;

I will not fear;

what can man do to me?”

-Hebrews 13:5-6

 

So it hit me today what’s been wrong with me. I’ve been buying into some deep-seated, subtle, and deadly lies.

 

I’ve believed the lie that there is anything I need other than Jesus. I’ve felt that if I could just have this, or that, or her, I’d be happy. Sometimes that isn’t Christ’s way. Sometimes the “right” thing isn’t supposed to happen, isn’t really right. Sometimes the road we are given to walk is broken. Sometimes all you get out of following Jesus is…Jesus. God has been teaching me this, and I’ve been slowly letting it become a part of me. I’ve been grudgingly dealing with it-sort of accepting that Jesus is, in some theoretical sense, enough, while stubbornly refusing to be happy unless I get what I want.

 

Today I’m trying to take it a step further. Today I’m walking away from the lie that Jesus is only enough for me to limp through life, die, and let everything get better. I am walking towards the truth that Jesus is also enough for me to be whole. For me to be fulfilled. For life to be satisfying. I want to move past acknowledging that Christ is all I need, and then refusing to be happy unless I have more. I want to run screaming into the truth that Christ is happiness. Don’t get me wrong; this world is not my home, I don’t belong here, and I will never be completely at peace until I am with Christ in Heaven. Still, I’m embracing the idea that even now, Christ is with me on earth. And that changes everything.

 

Those of you who have walked through life with me over the past year or so know that these lessons were not easy, and those of you who are still walking beside me know that I continue to struggle with them. I haven’t mastered them yet, but today, I am acknowledging that they are true, and I am choosing to walk forward in them. This world has torn my heart out, and sometimes I wish it would stay out, and I could just be numb. But we were not made for anesthesia; we were made for life-joy, pain, and all. So I am going to trust Jesus, who paid for my joy with His pain. I am going to trust Him with my heart, with my friends, and with my family. And one day, I will look back on this twisted road, and realize that it was straight. I will realize that it was exactly what God wanted for me. And one day I will realize that what God wanted was best. I love ya’ll, and I pray this for you as well. God bless you,

 

Doug

 

Let me know that you hear me/Let me know your touch/Let me know that you love me/And let that be enough

-J. Foreman

 

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