“Slow down, Pa, you just ran over Jesus!”

Andy Schlafly is a heretic. He’s the guy who started a new online Bible translation project, in which the Bible is translated the same way as Wikipedia is edited, which is of course the best way to do it. Soon your BIble will read: “For God so loved the world, that John Smith is a dumbass!! HAHAHA!”

If any of you have the stomach to look: Andy’s The Conservative Bible Project seeks to translate the Bible in such a way that “liberal bias” is removed. How? By using “Powerful Conservative Terms” for one thing. Also, they avoid “liberal wordiness”, by which they mean they don’t use “Yahweh”. Which is great, because if anyone ever wrote a book about me, I’d want them to avoid using my proper name as an expression of my hot conservative love for the modern nation-state of Amerisrael, or whatever country it is Andy lives in. That makes sense, right?

Just so everyone knows: the minute some evangelical leader expresses appreciation for this blasphemous insanity (and it will happen), I will point out that such compromise with the system is exactly the sort of idolatry that got Jesus killed, and start issuing anathemas. Now there’s a conservative term.

This is idolatry plain and simple, people. The conservative bandwagon just ran over Jesus, and we don’t care, as long as we can get some political power out of it. It’s just like that one guy said, “Better that one man die for the people, than that the whole nation perish.” And that guy was great! He went on to murder God, but aside from that, he preserved his country. For a few years. Then it was destroyed, and all the inhabitants either exiled or murdered. So…he turned out to be not so smart. There’s a lesson for us here somewhere, I just know it…

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